I think I could just talk about self-love all day, for the rest of my life.
Just hours and hours on end about loving ourselves, and what it takes, and how it looks, and why it’s the solution to every problem, and why I know for sure it’s the swiftest path to God.
I promise you, I would get everlasting life just from doing this alone.
But I know I can’t. There’s something else pulling me.
A responsibility of a kind, without the obligation piece. See, I truly feel that once we’ve successfully journeyed a path in this human life, we have a divine responsibility to leave a few clues behind us along that path that those who may be coming behind us can pick up.
Clues that not only collapse the learning curve of that journey, but also help take the fear out, and the despair that may be surrounding all those blessed souls who’s lives, for some reason or other, have called them to walk along the same way.
For me, that path is healing – the body, and the life.
I know what’s it’s like to receive a scary diagnosis. A terminal one, even. For me, that was AIDS and kidney failure. So, I know what’s it’s like to try and look into your future and see nothing but a quick ending. I know what’s it’s like to have dreams that the health of your body won’t allow you to manifest. To be so tired that even saying, “thank you,” seems like more than you can even muster for the day. I know what it’s like to have doctors, family, friends, pity you, pray for you, but believe whole-heartedly that even in doing so, your days are numbered.
I know what it’s like to be dying before you’ve ever truly lived.
I also know what it’s like to live inside of a painful life. To not be happy. To have more shame about yourself than you have pride, or appreciation, or gratitude. To have toxic, painful relationships, work that makes you feel imprisoned instead of fulfilled, horror and disappointment when you see yourself in the mirror, low self-esteem, poor body image, no money, and stressful decisions every month as you sit and decide which bills you can pay and which utility you can live without this month because you don’t have enough money to pay them all.
I know what dying while living looks like. I really, really do.
But I also know what it looks like to heal: your whole life. Your whole body. And miraculously so.
I know what it takes to really live while you’re alive, to enjoy the taste of your days, and love the feel of everything that you are. I know how to start that journey, and to travel it well.
And while I’d truly love to sit back, cook in my kitchen, and chat with friends about Love all day (I do a lot of that, even still), the topic of healing won’t let me rest.
If I never shared what I learned on my journey about how to take your wounded life, or your sick body, and pour love, surrender and the cosmic truth and energy of the soul all over it until it comes out shining, and clean, and deliciously healthy and alive, I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night.
I know, because for many years I didn’t.
I didn’t share.
I didn’t want to talk about healing because I told myself I didn’t want to be “boxed in,” or limited in my teachings, or conversations. But the deeper truth was I was scared of what people would say, because my perception on the topic is so different than the mainstream conversation, even amongst some spiritual teachers. See, there’s a whole lot to me, and what I know, and what I’m passionate about. And previously, I used to fear that healing would overshadow the other parts of me. So I didn’t talk about it much; I pushed it down and covered over it with other conversations.
And I didn’t sleep well because of that suppression . Or feel well either.
But what I now know is that when we share our stories, and leave clues behind for those sacred travelers who journey our previous path behind us, we become more of the Light. And that Light bans any shadow we could try and cast on ourselves, and the shadows anyone else may try and cast on us.
Sharing our stories, and the wisdom we gained from healing our wounds is our purpose, and the path to becoming a fuller version of our most Divine, God-Self.
And I’m all about becoming more of me. And I’m all about having a better relationship with the Light.
I think that’s what loving ourself really is anyway – becoming more of our most Divine Self, and having a better relationship with the Light.
The Light outside, and The Light within.
So, yes, I’m a teacher of self-love. A self-love advocate, if you will. A love my/yourself junkie, even. But I’m also a healer. Not necessarily the type that you go to place the entire possibility of your healing in their hands, but the type you go to when you’re ready to learn how to place your healing in your own hands, and what the healing journey really takes, and why you already absolutely deserve it, in the first place.
I am a healer who gives you the clues that I learned the hard way on how to return your body, your life, your heart back to wellbeing, and wholeness. And the type that won’t let you forget the divine truth that you are already, always, and in all ways ENOUGH. A Divine and Cosmic spark of God, wearing jeans and a t-shirt for a little while, who has everything within them already to be worthy, to be loved, to be lovable, to be safe, to be whole, and to create the juicy, delicious life they desire, and deserve.
So, indeed, I can’t sleep anymore until I leave a clue for you to pick up to help you heal. Because then, you can begin to leave clues behind yourself for those blessed beings who have started to come after you.
Each one teach one. Each one remembering we are one.
And in truth, healing is another act of love, anyway. For when we begin to heal, we bend ourselves back to Love. Like the plants who have been battered by the night rains, who in the morning can be found stretching and bending themselves back upward towards the Light, back to their Source. That’s what I’ve found healing actually is: the practice/path by which we bend ourselves back to Love, back to Source.
So in a way, that’s all I’ll be still talking about: Love. And all the ways we must shower it on ourselves (and others), and bend ourselves back to it when our lives have rained down on us.
The work of a healer and self-love junkie.
Much ❤️, Jerome