Recently, a client asked me: “Are you so integrated all the time? So in the Light, and connected to your Self?”
Um, FUCK NO. But I do come back fast. That’s the gift of what I’ve learned through my life: I know how to come back home fast.
But let’s not bullshit ourselves, becoming a “well being” doesn’t mean there won’t be painful days, or times you’re rocked with fear, or illnesses that show up, nor that your life will look like unicorns, and glitter, and great sex and juicy, delicious, high vibrational experiences 24/7. That’s not human life. It’s not what you signed up for either. You signed up to have a human experience, which means you said yes to pleasure mostly, and pain some times. Contrast is how we grow, and gain clarity, and create bigger stuff in this Universe of duality.
Contrast is necessary. No matter what profession, age, or level of “enlightenment” you may embody, nobody gets out of this life without it.
So, NO, perfect integration is not a part of my life, nor my desire for overall well-being. But wholeness is, which means that no matter what happens, I know I’m still worthy, enough, and loved, and that I know how to reorient myself back to the Light, and back to the central part of myself that knows that this, too, will work out in my favor (even if its sucks currently).
And it also means that the timeframe it takes me to do so gets shorter and shorter. What used to takes months to realign (years sometimes) takes days now – hours if I’m really paying attention.
Being a “well being” isn’t about living a perfect life, but it is about living a delicious one. A delicious life where you’ve got a deeper connection to yourself, a better relationship with yourself, and the tools and wisdom to turn the Light back on when the darkness comes.
I am not perfectly integrated all the time. But I am deliciously whole.
And trust me, that’s enough.