As souls, we don’t manifest what we want; we manifest what we allow. And the state/process of “allowing” is simply how well we’re in alignment with the energy of our soul by thinking good-feeling thoughts, relaxing, being happy, trusting in the Universe to support us, and just allowing ourselves to generally feel good.
And the better we get at allowing, the better and better our lives become.
And when we’re not allowing, the worse and worse our lives become.
For most of my life, I was not good at allowing. Actually, I sucked at it. I was “all worry, no play,” and thought I had to control everything, or “make everything happen” myself.
I always kept my “to-do list” FULL and overflowing;
I thought bad-feeling thoughts about my life and my body;
I tried to hide my sexuality from people I loved;
I worked hard, trying to climb the ladder of success;
I worked way more than I played;
I worried that things wouldn’t work out for me if I didn’t make them;
I tried to control EVERYTHING.
Until it all came crashing down in 2004, when my body had had enough of me “not allowing” and I found myself in the hospital with seven days to live.
Nearly dying was such a beautiful wake-up call on how to live, because you get to ask yourself “the end of your life” questions:
“Did I live my dreams?”
“Did I live my purpose?”
“Was I myself in my life…my true self?
“Did I live my life how I really wanted to, or was I living my life how someone else wanted me to?
“Did I enjoy my life?”
And after I had reviewed the life I had been living, my answer was: “Well, no, I hadn’t.” I was so busy, so shame-full, so worried, so stressed, so unfulfilled, so unhappy. And I had reached the point where my body just couldn’t take it anymore.
So on my deathbed, my soul spoke to me very clearly, and said, “either you’re going to learn how to live better, or you’re going to learn how to die quickly.”
So I made a decision to learn how to live better, and how to let life be better to me. And Spirit showed me that “the Secret” to it all is ALLOWING.
And I did. I put it all into practice and got out of my own way. And allowing healed my body, and transformed my life into something utterly delicious, and unrecognizable to who I used to be.
Today, I make sure to ALLOW more fun, joy, peace, love, and relaxation into my life.
wipe my to-do list clean,
use gay lingo and say “honey,”
take hot baths with jazz music and epsom salts,
call my friends and chat about silly things,
do absolutely NO-THING,
visit amusement parks and ride the rides,
order what I really want to eat off the menu without counting calories,
make lists of things to hand over to the Universe,
take walks in nature,
allow myself to feel sexy,
perform random acts of love on someone,
trust Life to support me…